See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 21: A song you listen to when you're happy.
Well fuck, there are hundreds of songs that fit this. I'll pick from a band I haven't picked from in a while. Swoon, by The Chemical Brothers.
Thursday 31 March 2011
Wednesday 30 March 2011
Song 20/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 20: A song you listen to when you're angry.
I don't like feeling angry, I really hate it. I'm angry a lot, and I just try to let it pass. I need active music to help me get over it and calm down. Sometimes I need something to listen to to give me a controlled anger, to help me feel it and direct it to something positive: self improvement. That song is King Kill, by Marilyn Manson.
Song 20: A song you listen to when you're angry.
I don't like feeling angry, I really hate it. I'm angry a lot, and I just try to let it pass. I need active music to help me get over it and calm down. Sometimes I need something to listen to to give me a controlled anger, to help me feel it and direct it to something positive: self improvement. That song is King Kill, by Marilyn Manson.
Tuesday 29 March 2011
Vidya to-do list
According to my Steam account, I have 118 games. Accounting for DLC, demos and free games I've long since deleted, I'm gonna say that's 80 games. By far, my favourite game is Team Fortress 2. I main Pyro and mostly play arena.
However, my other 79 games are not loved as much. A lot were bought during sales, came in packs or were free with a pre-purchase. I think it's time I compile a list of the main games I have and want to play, along with progress of what I've done.
In order of priority...
Mass Effect 2.
Crysis
Oddworld 1, 2, 3 and 4.
Dawn of War 1 & 2 +expansions
Company of Heroes +expansions
FEAR 2, however I'm near the end and it's getting very boring.
Aquaria
However, my other 79 games are not loved as much. A lot were bought during sales, came in packs or were free with a pre-purchase. I think it's time I compile a list of the main games I have and want to play, along with progress of what I've done.
In order of priority...
Mass Effect 2.
Crysis
Oddworld 1, 2, 3 and 4.
Dawn of War 1 & 2 +expansions
Company of Heroes +expansions
FEAR 2, however I'm near the end and it's getting very boring.
Aquaria
Songs 16 - 19
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 16: A song you used to love but now hate
I used to love System of a Down. They were my favourite band for a while, but now I can't stand a lot of their stuff. Probably the biggest contrast from then-to-now is Needles. I really dislike the song, and I used to love it.
Song 17: A song you hear often on the radio
Song 18: A song you wish you heard on the radio
Ok, I promised myself I would do this properly... but I literally do not ever listen to the radio, and even when I'm forced to I have no idea what I'm listening to. SKIP SONGS D:
Song 19: A song from your favourite album
This is easy. My favourite album is Marilyn Manson's Holy Wood, it's a very powerful album in a lot of ways. The most powerful song, even taken out of context, is almost definitely The Nobodies.
Song 16: A song you used to love but now hate
I used to love System of a Down. They were my favourite band for a while, but now I can't stand a lot of their stuff. Probably the biggest contrast from then-to-now is Needles. I really dislike the song, and I used to love it.
Song 17: A song you hear often on the radio
Song 18: A song you wish you heard on the radio
Ok, I promised myself I would do this properly... but I literally do not ever listen to the radio, and even when I'm forced to I have no idea what I'm listening to. SKIP SONGS D:
Song 19: A song from your favourite album
This is easy. My favourite album is Marilyn Manson's Holy Wood, it's a very powerful album in a lot of ways. The most powerful song, even taken out of context, is almost definitely The Nobodies.
Thursday 24 March 2011
Song 14 + 15/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 14: A song nobody would expect me to like.
All of my friends know I don't like rap. However, most of them don't realise that there are 4 songs by Eminem I really like, my favourite of which is Without Me.
Song 15: A song that describes you.
Holy fuck. This is hard. Not because I can't think of any, but because the song that describes me has already been chosen (Song 10). So I'll have to think of a new one...
Only one thing comes to mind. When I was still with my ex, she got me to listen to this song and said it was about us. I wish I didn't believe her, because I expected her to keep me from falling apart. She took too much responsibility for my happiness, and I wish I didn't let her do that. No one can stop someone else falling apart, and it's too much to expect someone to try. She also mentioned the fact that I laugh and don't believe someone when they complement me. I don't see much inside of myself to like. There is a part of me that thinks that this song is still very much about us, because she was where I am, or was at the time, and really tried to help me. Some of it stuck, a lot didn't. The Fragile, by Nine Inch Nails, is about me, about who I was, and what I'm trying to get away from, in myself and her.
Song 14: A song nobody would expect me to like.
All of my friends know I don't like rap. However, most of them don't realise that there are 4 songs by Eminem I really like, my favourite of which is Without Me.
Song 15: A song that describes you.
Holy fuck. This is hard. Not because I can't think of any, but because the song that describes me has already been chosen (Song 10). So I'll have to think of a new one...
Only one thing comes to mind. When I was still with my ex, she got me to listen to this song and said it was about us. I wish I didn't believe her, because I expected her to keep me from falling apart. She took too much responsibility for my happiness, and I wish I didn't let her do that. No one can stop someone else falling apart, and it's too much to expect someone to try. She also mentioned the fact that I laugh and don't believe someone when they complement me. I don't see much inside of myself to like. There is a part of me that thinks that this song is still very much about us, because she was where I am, or was at the time, and really tried to help me. Some of it stuck, a lot didn't. The Fragile, by Nine Inch Nails, is about me, about who I was, and what I'm trying to get away from, in myself and her.
Tuesday 22 March 2011
Busted
Talking to other trans people, or just reading their stories, there is a huge occurrence between almost all of them: being caught dressing while still in the closet.
I've been close once and only once. I had gotten my first tights and was showing my friend on webcam. My computer is in the loungeroom, so I was exposed, but I thought mum would be out for hours. Since I live with my mother I was the only one home. I was feeling awesome dressing how I wanted in that part of the house, usually it was just reserved for my room. Then I heard the door and all the good feelings left instantly. Now, the loungeroom is next to the kitchen, which is where the door is. My room is on the other side of the kitchen from the computer. This was it, I thought. This is the night we're going to have that talk, no psyching myself up all day, no saying "mum, I have something to tell you", it was going to be like this: busted in front of the computer crossdressing. I ran.
There are two ways back to my room. I ran into the back of the loungeroom and called out to mum to lure her one way, so I could run the other way. Somehow I made it into my room without my mum seeing the skirt, tights and girls top. It all felt unreal, like it wasn't happening. How could she possibly not have seen what I was wearing? There was a clear line of sight at one point, I was sure of it. I called bullshit on reality itself when I was in my room, naked, and it just stared back at me and said "No, you made it. Somehow"
By the way, this all happened with my friend watching. The webcam was still on.
It all happened in probably 10 seconds, but felt like hours. Hours of panic and fear and frustration. I was off the hook. Mum asked what I was doing, running around the house. This part was easy to bluff. I just said I was in my underwear and didn't want her to see. That had actually happened before, so it was a viable explanation for me.
In my room I got on the laptop and signed into MSN but appeared offline so it would sign me out on the big PC, and turn off the webcam. When I got back out to the big PC I got back on MSN and talked to my friend, who demanded to know what had happened and refused to believe that I had not been caught. He said it was like watching a slasher movie, the killer was right behind me.
That was the end of my crossdressing.... for about 3 days. I couldn't make it go away, I needed the clothes too much to stop. After I had calmed down that night, a bizarre thought popped into my head: I almost wanted to be busted. It would take the matter out of my own hands, out of my control. Be done with it and get it out ion the open, remove the need to hide.
I've been close once and only once. I had gotten my first tights and was showing my friend on webcam. My computer is in the loungeroom, so I was exposed, but I thought mum would be out for hours. Since I live with my mother I was the only one home. I was feeling awesome dressing how I wanted in that part of the house, usually it was just reserved for my room. Then I heard the door and all the good feelings left instantly. Now, the loungeroom is next to the kitchen, which is where the door is. My room is on the other side of the kitchen from the computer. This was it, I thought. This is the night we're going to have that talk, no psyching myself up all day, no saying "mum, I have something to tell you", it was going to be like this: busted in front of the computer crossdressing. I ran.
There are two ways back to my room. I ran into the back of the loungeroom and called out to mum to lure her one way, so I could run the other way. Somehow I made it into my room without my mum seeing the skirt, tights and girls top. It all felt unreal, like it wasn't happening. How could she possibly not have seen what I was wearing? There was a clear line of sight at one point, I was sure of it. I called bullshit on reality itself when I was in my room, naked, and it just stared back at me and said "No, you made it. Somehow"
By the way, this all happened with my friend watching. The webcam was still on.
It all happened in probably 10 seconds, but felt like hours. Hours of panic and fear and frustration. I was off the hook. Mum asked what I was doing, running around the house. This part was easy to bluff. I just said I was in my underwear and didn't want her to see. That had actually happened before, so it was a viable explanation for me.
In my room I got on the laptop and signed into MSN but appeared offline so it would sign me out on the big PC, and turn off the webcam. When I got back out to the big PC I got back on MSN and talked to my friend, who demanded to know what had happened and refused to believe that I had not been caught. He said it was like watching a slasher movie, the killer was right behind me.
That was the end of my crossdressing.... for about 3 days. I couldn't make it go away, I needed the clothes too much to stop. After I had calmed down that night, a bizarre thought popped into my head: I almost wanted to be busted. It would take the matter out of my own hands, out of my control. Be done with it and get it out ion the open, remove the need to hide.
Drawings n shit
I have a sketchbook that I carry with me so I can just draw whatevers on my mind when it comes up. No sense in wasting inspiration, right?
I'm pretty happy that I only have one fanart picture in here :D
I also don't have a scanner so this is just taken on my webcam with me holding the book up, sorry about the fingers.
Fuck yeah Super Meat Boy
For this last one, I started drawing windows and it kinda evolved and took over the page lol
I'm pretty happy that I only have one fanart picture in here :D
I also don't have a scanner so this is just taken on my webcam with me holding the book up, sorry about the fingers.
Fuck yeah Super Meat Boy
Song 13/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 13: A song that is a guilty pleasure.
This is hard for me to admit... really really hard... it was an easy song to think of, but hard to actually admit I like it in public.
Sigh, here goes. Fireflies, by Owl City. I can't get enough of it, it's so fucking gay and makes me feel happy and giddy and ugh.
Song 13: A song that is a guilty pleasure.
This is hard for me to admit... really really hard... it was an easy song to think of, but hard to actually admit I like it in public.
Sigh, here goes. Fireflies, by Owl City. I can't get enough of it, it's so fucking gay and makes me feel happy and giddy and ugh.
Right where it belongs
I've been invited to a few "girls only" events in the last few months, and while it's nice, there is a part of me that thinks I really don't belong there. But why? I identify as female, I look fairly feminine, I have mini-boobs, I'm transitioning to be seen as female. I guess what doesn't help my mental state is what I see myself as, and what I'm missing.
I still don't have a female voice and I still haven't done anything about my facial hair, beyond shaving it and wearing foundation to hide it. I guess I don't see myself as "female enough" to be included in a girls-only place, especially when it's a cis-girls-only place that's open to transgirls. Ugh it's all very convoluted inside my head, and I'm probably making a way bigger deal out of it than it needs to be.
There is an event on early next month for female-identifying people, and highlights the fact it's inviting crossdressers, transsexuals, cis, intersex at any stage in whatever transition they're going through, which is comforting.
I guess my sense of non-belonging is just a simple lack of going to things. I feel like an outsider simply because I am, I've never been. Maybe I should make a bigger effort to make myself feel like I belong and go to things I'm invited to.
I still don't have a female voice and I still haven't done anything about my facial hair, beyond shaving it and wearing foundation to hide it. I guess I don't see myself as "female enough" to be included in a girls-only place, especially when it's a cis-girls-only place that's open to transgirls. Ugh it's all very convoluted inside my head, and I'm probably making a way bigger deal out of it than it needs to be.
There is an event on early next month for female-identifying people, and highlights the fact it's inviting crossdressers, transsexuals, cis, intersex at any stage in whatever transition they're going through, which is comforting.
I guess my sense of non-belonging is just a simple lack of going to things. I feel like an outsider simply because I am, I've never been. Maybe I should make a bigger effort to make myself feel like I belong and go to things I'm invited to.
Song 12/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 12: A song from a band you hate.
I don't listen to bands I don't like, or I try not to. I usually give bands a go if they have a few good songs, but like I said with Dani California, bad bands can have amazing songs. Following that train of thought, today's song is Sabotage, by The Beastie Boys.
Song 12: A song from a band you hate.
I don't listen to bands I don't like, or I try not to. I usually give bands a go if they have a few good songs, but like I said with Dani California, bad bands can have amazing songs. Following that train of thought, today's song is Sabotage, by The Beastie Boys.
Sunday 20 March 2011
Sleep overs
A lot of friends have been sleeping over at my place lately. We just share my bed, which is cool. Or it would be, but I'll talk about why it isn't later.
About a month ago my friend slept over and was the first of my latest spree of impromptu slumber parties. He was having trouble with his girlfriend, so brought over weed to bitch about it all. It was a fun night, getting high and watching retarded YouTube videos. We decided to get to sleep. He slept next to me, and put his arm around me, which was something I'd been wanting for a long time, just to have someone hug me like that. Then he slid his hand down to my underpants, and said "wanna do something?". We were both very high, and I've been lonely lately, but I still said no. He put his arm back around my stomach and we went to sleep like that.
The other times people have slept over have not been such a nice sleeping experience. One friend, I get a very big "do not touch" vibe from, and the other just takes up a lot of room despite being one of the skinniest people I know.
Last night was my skinny friend sleeping over. I said I've been drifting from my other high school friends, and he said "well, what you're doing is pretty... weird". I think a lot of my old friends think that way too, I've changed a lot in a few years. I wonder how long I'll still have most of them in my life...
About a month ago my friend slept over and was the first of my latest spree of impromptu slumber parties. He was having trouble with his girlfriend, so brought over weed to bitch about it all. It was a fun night, getting high and watching retarded YouTube videos. We decided to get to sleep. He slept next to me, and put his arm around me, which was something I'd been wanting for a long time, just to have someone hug me like that. Then he slid his hand down to my underpants, and said "wanna do something?". We were both very high, and I've been lonely lately, but I still said no. He put his arm back around my stomach and we went to sleep like that.
The other times people have slept over have not been such a nice sleeping experience. One friend, I get a very big "do not touch" vibe from, and the other just takes up a lot of room despite being one of the skinniest people I know.
Last night was my skinny friend sleeping over. I said I've been drifting from my other high school friends, and he said "well, what you're doing is pretty... weird". I think a lot of my old friends think that way too, I've changed a lot in a few years. I wonder how long I'll still have most of them in my life...
Songs 9, 10 and 11/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 9: A song you can dance to.
I seriously can't dance. However, there is one song that has a dance I wish I knew: Thriller, by Michael Jackson.
Song 10: A song that makes you fall asleep.
It doesn't have that effect on me anymore, but there was one song that I always played as I was going to sleep every night for at least a year. The Private Psychedelic Reel, by The Chemical Brothers.
Song 11: A song from your favourite band.
This is hard. I suppose my favourite band right now is Placebo, and I suppose my favourite song by them is Special K. It's pretty interesting, it's describing a trip on ketamine, but talking about being in love. Love + drugs = good song.
Song 9: A song you can dance to.
I seriously can't dance. However, there is one song that has a dance I wish I knew: Thriller, by Michael Jackson.
Song 10: A song that makes you fall asleep.
It doesn't have that effect on me anymore, but there was one song that I always played as I was going to sleep every night for at least a year. The Private Psychedelic Reel, by The Chemical Brothers.
Song 11: A song from your favourite band.
This is hard. I suppose my favourite band right now is Placebo, and I suppose my favourite song by them is Special K. It's pretty interesting, it's describing a trip on ketamine, but talking about being in love. Love + drugs = good song.
Thursday 17 March 2011
Song 8/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 8: A song you know all the words to.
I know all the words to dozens of songs. I'm not joking. However, the longest song I know all the words to is Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence, by Dream Theater, which goes for 42 minutes.
Song 8: A song you know all the words to.
I know all the words to dozens of songs. I'm not joking. However, the longest song I know all the words to is Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence, by Dream Theater, which goes for 42 minutes.
Song 7/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 7: A song that reminds you of a certain event.
I lost my virginity listening to Out of Control, by The Chemical Brothers.
The end.
Song 7: A song that reminds you of a certain event.
I lost my virginity listening to Out of Control, by The Chemical Brothers.
The end.
Tuesday 15 March 2011
Song 6/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Day 6: a song that reminds you of somewhere
Once again, I could pick Battle for the Sun and be done with it. However, I can't pick the same song twice. So what shall I pick? I've been going through a System of a Down phase again lately, and a lot of Steal This Album reminds me of highschool, which is not a place I like thinking about. However, one class I loved was multimedia. When I found out I could animate, I did little else. One of my first big animations was to a SoaD song. I poured hours into that thing, refining parts and learning as I was going and learnt a lot about pacing and movement. That song was Forest, and it reminds me of one of the few good parts of high school.
Day 6: a song that reminds you of somewhere
Once again, I could pick Battle for the Sun and be done with it. However, I can't pick the same song twice. So what shall I pick? I've been going through a System of a Down phase again lately, and a lot of Steal This Album reminds me of highschool, which is not a place I like thinking about. However, one class I loved was multimedia. When I found out I could animate, I did little else. One of my first big animations was to a SoaD song. I poured hours into that thing, refining parts and learning as I was going and learnt a lot about pacing and movement. That song was Forest, and it reminds me of one of the few good parts of high school.
Monday 14 March 2011
Song 4+5/30
I missed a day >.>
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 4: A song that makes you sad.
Wow, this one is hard. There aren't many that make me sad just because the song is sad, music makes me sad when I'm reminded of someone. There are songs that remind me of ex-lovers and old friends, but there is one that makes me remember not only someone who used to be close to me, how much the song hurt me because it was so relevent to our situation, but it also reminds me how I used to be which is something I hate to be reminded of. This is also the song I took this blog's name from. For those reasons, I choose Dirty Magic, by The Offspring as my Song That Makes You Sad.
Song 5: A song that reminds you of someone.
While I could easily choose the same song for exactly the same reason as I just talked about, I'm going to go in another direction and not only pick a different song and band, but a song that reminds me of someone who was and still is a positive influence on my life. That song would be Battle for the Sun, but I've picked that for something else already. Soooo I pick Hey Big Spender, and I don't know who the artist is. Lol.
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 4: A song that makes you sad.
Wow, this one is hard. There aren't many that make me sad just because the song is sad, music makes me sad when I'm reminded of someone. There are songs that remind me of ex-lovers and old friends, but there is one that makes me remember not only someone who used to be close to me, how much the song hurt me because it was so relevent to our situation, but it also reminds me how I used to be which is something I hate to be reminded of. This is also the song I took this blog's name from. For those reasons, I choose Dirty Magic, by The Offspring as my Song That Makes You Sad.
Song 5: A song that reminds you of someone.
While I could easily choose the same song for exactly the same reason as I just talked about, I'm going to go in another direction and not only pick a different song and band, but a song that reminds me of someone who was and still is a positive influence on my life. That song would be Battle for the Sun, but I've picked that for something else already. Soooo I pick Hey Big Spender, and I don't know who the artist is. Lol.
Attention seeking
I am mostly a very reserved and shy person, and I can't help but get a little jealous of people who aren't. Especially when those people are also trans. I get jealous that these people can look attractive and have people say the nasty things they'd do to them, and I wonder, why not me? So I give it a try, and I never like myself afterwards. And it's no wonder, it's not me. I decided a long time ago that I'm just not that sexy outgoing person that everyone wants to fuck, and when I try to be I feel wrong.
I try to tell myself that I'll never do it again, but the jealousy is too much sometimes. That's why I avoid a certain type of person, or more accurately a certain group of people. It brings out the worst in me, my self-loathing, my I'm so fat thoughts and it makes me feel completely undesirable as a person. In those circles, I'm not your average tgirl. Outside of those circles, I am just your average tgirl, which is really jarring to experience.
I guess it's just an attempt to get out of my little rut where I'm so shy and reserved. I think I just need better ways to do it. Ones that don't make me hate myself for days afterwards.
I try to tell myself that I'll never do it again, but the jealousy is too much sometimes. That's why I avoid a certain type of person, or more accurately a certain group of people. It brings out the worst in me, my self-loathing, my I'm so fat thoughts and it makes me feel completely undesirable as a person. In those circles, I'm not your average tgirl. Outside of those circles, I am just your average tgirl, which is really jarring to experience.
I guess it's just an attempt to get out of my little rut where I'm so shy and reserved. I think I just need better ways to do it. Ones that don't make me hate myself for days afterwards.
Saturday 12 March 2011
Song 3/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Song 3/30: A song that makes you happy.
I thought this would be harder to answer than it is, but it's Battle for the Sun, by Placebo.
Why does it make me happy? Because it came along when I needed something like it. It's as simple as that.
Song 3/30: A song that makes you happy.
I thought this would be harder to answer than it is, but it's Battle for the Sun, by Placebo.
Why does it make me happy? Because it came along when I needed something like it. It's as simple as that.
Friday 11 March 2011
Song 2/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Day 2 - Your least favourite song
That's hard, there are heaps of songs I hate... I don't wanna give a boring answer like that Willow Smith song. What makes me hate a song is lost potential, and there are a lot of songs in my library that could have been so much more. Then there's a song which is amazing by a band that isn't very good, which shows way more lost potential than one bad song by a great artist. So with that in mind, in a rather backwards sort of way, one of my least favourite songs is Dani California, by Red Hot Chilli Peppers.
Day 2 - Your least favourite song
That's hard, there are heaps of songs I hate... I don't wanna give a boring answer like that Willow Smith song. What makes me hate a song is lost potential, and there are a lot of songs in my library that could have been so much more. Then there's a song which is amazing by a band that isn't very good, which shows way more lost potential than one bad song by a great artist. So with that in mind, in a rather backwards sort of way, one of my least favourite songs is Dani California, by Red Hot Chilli Peppers.
Thursday 10 March 2011
Song 1/30
See the 30/30 Challenge here!
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Only now do I realise that I copied this from an American source and now I can't be bothered to edit all the U's back into "Favorite". Oh well, onto the show!
My favourite song right now is Three Days, by Jane's Addiction. I have a passion for long songs, which is why I fell in love with Dream Theater so fast. I was almost going to take a line from the song to name this blog but none seem to fit with what I'm about, mostly because I haven't had a drug-fuelled 3 days of sex and spiritual journeys yet.
Ok, removed from the 30/30 challenge, I'm going out tonight! Someone I haven't seen in a while, who kept bailing on me when we made plans, invited me out and I was tentative, and then I found out that 2 more people who I've seen a lot more are going too, so I said yes. It should be a good time, no idea what to expect but it will be nice to see this friend again. The only downside is that my transgroup is on tonight, which moved it's usual time from yesterday to today with not much notice. Sigh.
Day 01 - Your favorite song
Only now do I realise that I copied this from an American source and now I can't be bothered to edit all the U's back into "Favorite". Oh well, onto the show!
My favourite song right now is Three Days, by Jane's Addiction. I have a passion for long songs, which is why I fell in love with Dream Theater so fast. I was almost going to take a line from the song to name this blog but none seem to fit with what I'm about, mostly because I haven't had a drug-fuelled 3 days of sex and spiritual journeys yet.
Ok, removed from the 30/30 challenge, I'm going out tonight! Someone I haven't seen in a while, who kept bailing on me when we made plans, invited me out and I was tentative, and then I found out that 2 more people who I've seen a lot more are going too, so I said yes. It should be a good time, no idea what to expect but it will be nice to see this friend again. The only downside is that my transgroup is on tonight, which moved it's usual time from yesterday to today with not much notice. Sigh.
30 Songs in 30 Days
Thirty days, thirty songs. I'm going to make an effort to do thirty different songs, I'm pretty sure I can do it
day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year
day 01 - your favorite song
day 02 - your least favorite song
day 03 - a song that makes you happy
day 04 - a song that makes you sad
day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
day 09 - a song that you can dance to
day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
day 11 - a song from your favorite band
day 12 - a song from a band you hate
day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
day 15 - a song that describes you
day 16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
day 17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
day 18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
day 19 - a song from your favorite album
day 20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
day 21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
day 22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
day 23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
day 24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
day 25 - a song that makes you laugh
day 26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
day 27 - a song that you wish you could play
day 28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
day 29 - a song from your childhood
day 30 - your favorite song at this time last year
Wednesday 9 March 2011
How do you explain Minecraft to someone?
Not only is it someone that hasn't played Minecraft, but someone who is not a gamer at all. This is a problem for me and finding people to relate to in the trans community here. There's one thing we all share: transsexualism, but there's very few that like video games. I found two other transgirls about a year ago that were gamers but ehh we don't talk anymore.
I suppose there are worse things to not have in common with people. But it's very strange. I met a transguy not long ago who got a Grand Theft Auto reference I made and I felt like I'd found an oasis in a desert.
A genderqueer person asked me what I've been doing lately, and I said playing Minecraft. In other circles that's a discussion starter and a very common thing to devote a whole day (or month) to. This person looked at me and asked what Minecraft was. I started explaining, and just fumbled words together about making a library in an underground fortress, which just confused them even more. Next time they ask, I think I'll just say I've been drawing in the park, which they'll appreciate.
However I think this is to do with growing up. I was a boy, boys play video games. And since I don't give a shit about what I do in terms of gender (except for probably bathrooms) I still play video games. A lot. I do what I like.
Maybe I just need to learn to separate gaming life from those who do not understand it.
I suppose there are worse things to not have in common with people. But it's very strange. I met a transguy not long ago who got a Grand Theft Auto reference I made and I felt like I'd found an oasis in a desert.
A genderqueer person asked me what I've been doing lately, and I said playing Minecraft. In other circles that's a discussion starter and a very common thing to devote a whole day (or month) to. This person looked at me and asked what Minecraft was. I started explaining, and just fumbled words together about making a library in an underground fortress, which just confused them even more. Next time they ask, I think I'll just say I've been drawing in the park, which they'll appreciate.
However I think this is to do with growing up. I was a boy, boys play video games. And since I don't give a shit about what I do in terms of gender (except for probably bathrooms) I still play video games. A lot. I do what I like.
Maybe I just need to learn to separate gaming life from those who do not understand it.
Monday 7 March 2011
Don't hide baby
This is my first post here. I'm new to blogging, but wanted a place to express my thoughts. I am... very inarticulate when speaking, but much better in writing and that's not because you can pour hours of your time into a post to refine and perfect it, I just seem to be able to communicate more in text than in person. Pairing this vocal awkwardness with chronic shyness and it's easy to think I have a lot of communication problems.
I made this Blogger to document my journey into life. I don't plan on writing about what I do every day because, frankly, what I do every day is depressing and boring. So I'll write about events, revelations, thoughts and concepts that mostly fall under the "transgender" umbrella. Other things include video games, art, music and maybe a little kinky shit every now and then.
As for the blog's title, I look at complicated things in a simple manor, it seems to work for me (and is also the first line of a song I am very fond of)
I made this Blogger to document my journey into life. I don't plan on writing about what I do every day because, frankly, what I do every day is depressing and boring. So I'll write about events, revelations, thoughts and concepts that mostly fall under the "transgender" umbrella. Other things include video games, art, music and maybe a little kinky shit every now and then.
As for the blog's title, I look at complicated things in a simple manor, it seems to work for me (and is also the first line of a song I am very fond of)
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