Sunday, 9 September 2012

How much is too much?

I like to help people, especially new trans people. I like being that person, it makes me happy. It makes me feel like I'm giving something back. I also like seeing people grow, become more confident, learn, evolve, change. But at what point do you decide that a person is just too much effort? Can you decide something like that?

I seem to gather people like myself, who like helping others, and we tell each other stories, and each of them has that One that made them give up. I know these people, and they wouldn't make a call like that lightly. So is it reasonable to say "abandon ship" and move on?

At what point does trying to help someone turn into being their only source of motivation?

Is there any point in carrying on this type of relationship when it just isn't working?

Most of these questions have long answers that seem to boil down to what your motivation is for making a call like this. There is definitely a wrong reason to bail on someone like this, but is there a right reason, or just less wrong ones?

If you are there to help this person learn and progress, and they don't listen and don't learn despite your best efforts over a long period of time, is there a reason to continue?

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