Trapped

Tonight ended sooner than I'd expected. A lot sooner. I had the choice of going home or staying in the city for hours and hours with a dead phone and iPod with about 20% battery. So I just went home.

Every time I walk in that door I remember why I always hesitate to come back. It's so small and loud and bright. And my mother is awful to live with. I can't have much privacy, and when I do she asks what I'm doing in my room. I can't even have friends over because she doesn't leave us alone, and gets angry when we make too much noise.

It's impossible to be tired, and just want quiet time as well, because she gets offended when I don't have the energy to listen to everything she says. I hate it when I've had a big night and I get home, exhausted, and she's still up, and wanting to know everything that happened with endless questions when I just want to sit down for a while first. It's a great night for me when I get home before her, so I can relax on my own terms.

But the worst is that she gets angry at me for being depressed.

This all wasn't too bad, because I had a way out. But now that way out is gone, so I'm left trying to cope with the prospect of staying here for a very very long time.