Wednesday, 7 December 2011

The inclusive isolating community

Serina and myself were out shopping in an op-shop, and we happened to see another trans-girl, who was looking at us, almost like she really wanted to say hi.

We really wanted to say hi to her as well. But we couldn't. It's just not done. Which is heartbreaking, and quite conflicting to what is spread around the community. We're meant to be a big family, and support each other so no one feels alone when it's so easy to feel that way.

And yet, the 3 of us exchange knowing looks, and go about our day, trying to not look at each other again.

No other community is like this, because no other community's desire is to blend in. Trans people want to be invisible, and just live their lives. But most bizarrely, the only place we want to be approached for being trans is at a support group, or with friends. In specific locations. At specific times. I see it partially stemming from a concept I posted about a while ago, no trans person wants to be "that trans person". We don't want to be singled out for our trans status, even if it's by another trans person in a safe (public) place. There's no other common ground, nor is it an appropriate place to approach anyone (in a clothes store).

There are some who just don't want to be part of the community at all, and stare daggers at any trans person who dares exist in the same dimension as them, which is sad, but I can see where they're coming from. But the other day when we saw this girl was different.

It's such a conflicting coexistance. It's almost like being part of Fight Club.

1 comment:

  1. Hi I certainly agree with you. It can be very hard out there on your own. Yes some want to be isolated and go stealth but most just want to live "normal" lives. So if I see any one in a shop that I'm certain is TG I stick my neck out and start talking to then, not necessarily about TG things but I live that to then to do. Just making contact is a big thing to many and may just help then through another day and maybe I get a new friend.

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