Exit Planet Dust, part 2

I've finally managed to find a way out of this house and I'm terrified.

Living here is stressful and annoying and overstimulating... but it's all I've known. I've lived here for 23 years, and the longest time I've been away was 2 weeks. We never moved, I was a baby in the same room I still sleep in.

The prospect of moving out is... appealing but also scary. I have a large safety net here, and leaving it behind means, well, I'm on my own. I'll survive, I know that. And I guess I'm focusing on the idea of rent, where it will be a money sink. Which it is, but it's not just money that disappears. It's money that's being used to pay for where I live, my own place.

I also won't be alone: If all goes to plan, I'll be moving in with 3 other trans people, one of which I get along really well with, and the other two I like. I'll have my PC, my consoles, my games, my books, my music, my bed, my kink gear, my stuffed toys, my clothes, my art, my pills, my TV, my DVDs. I'll even get to cook for myself, and have food I enjoy, and be able to keep my own schedule without worrying I'm putting mum out by being up all night and sleeping all day.

I'll get to continue transitioning without worrying about family. I'll get to have people over. I'll get to have a relationship that isn't crippled by the presence of my mother. The rent is very cheap, so it's not like I won't be able to afford anything. I won't be cut off, quite the opposite. I'll be near a train station and I'm even on the same line as the one I'm on now.

But I'm still freaking out.