Made of glass

I went to a kink event last night with Serina, E and L, and had a great time. Since I'm exhausted and the words aren't coming, I'll blog about it later. But something happened last night at one point.

E and L were playing, so I sat on a couch near someone and tried to strike up conversation with someone, and didn't get a very good reception, which was kinda disappointing. On top of sitting in a low chair in a corset, I guess I had a look on my face that told Serina I was freaking out.

She kept looking over at me and mouthing the words "are you ok?" and I kept saying I'm fine. This kept up for a while, and I got really frustrated at her. It kinda felt like before, when she treated me like glass. After the last couple of months, this event was pretty awesome. I wasn't overstimulated at any point, not anxious, or scared, or anything. I was just having fun.

So to have her look over at me, worried I wasn't handling things... it made me kinda sad. Like maybe I hadn't changed as much as I thought. Eventually she came over to make sure I was ok, and I kinda snapped at her.

After a minute the guilt of that kinda washed over me. She was just looking out for me, and after some of the other times we've been at kink events, anyone would have been keeping an eye on me.